Human relations is simply the ability to get along well with people without giving up any of our basic values and self-respect. It is getting along with people-working, living and playing with people.
1. Why Human Relation Important?
- Human relation is a natural part of our jobs
We must realize that our jobs consist basically of two very distinct parts: the technical part if the job itself and the relationship part that requires us to work with others.
- Human relation is something we cannot delegate to someone else
It is our individual responsibility.
- Our human relation decides our interpersonal relationship with others
which in turn reveals the kind of person we really are.
- Relationship often decides our happiness or sadness at our jobs
Often, relationships are the main cause of job satisfaction or dissatisfaction. Without effective human relationship, we cannot do anything with others effectively.
Therefore an understanding of the basic concepts, and the application of basic human relating strategies will help us to develop job satisfaction and pride of job.
2. Understanding Human Behavior
There are three basic dynamics affecting human behavior, i.e. deciding why people do the things they do.
(a) Human Individuality
Each person is unique and different from another person, not only physically, but more so psychologically and philosophically. We each have different values, beliefs and attitudes. We view things differently from another person. As such we also behave differently from most other people.
This is the urge, the desire to do something or anything. We are each motivated by different things and for different reasons. Simply stated, for everyone of us, motivation is a very personal matter. Because of this, we not only do different things, we also do things differently. Eventually, what we do will affect how other people react to us.
(c) Ego/ Self Esteem
We each have a need to be appreciated, to be recognized and to be accepted by other people. Every one of us has an ego need. This need itself is one of the motivation factors for our actions. This need is a very strong driving force in our relationship with others.
3. “I” Accountability and Self-Image
Human relation is our attitude towards others. Two factors decide how we get along with others.
(a) How We Manage Our Own Behavior
We do not behave by chance. Neither do we behave “naturally”. We behave by choice. For example, we decide how we behave. We are not our behavior; we MANAGE our behavior. Therefore, we need to follow the principle of “I” accountability, which:
- Acknowledge that we had something to do with what has happened to us. Whatever happens to us, acknowledge that we either created it, promoted or at least allowed it.
- Explore our response actions.
- Take corrective action.
(b) How We See and Value Ourselves (Our Self-Image)
How we see others is often a reflection of how we see ourselves. Our interpersonal relationships start with our own self-image. How do we need to build a positive and empowering self-image? We can start by doing just one thing: do good things and remember that we did them. We need to reinforce the good in us from time to time.
4. Six Ways to Get Along Well with People
- Listen and listen actively when people are talking to us. Remember that people do not care how much we know until they know how much we care.
- Work with people, not against them. Work to collaborate, not to compete. Adopt the following work attitudes:
What can I do for you? Not, what can I do to you. It is you and I. Not, you or I.
- Focus on our similarities with people. Not, on differences from them. In focusing on similarities, we achieve commonalities. We establish rapport faster.
- Focus on things in and of people, which are useful in building a positive relationship with them. This will enable us to develop rapport with them faster. Decide that we want to have a positive relationship with people. Look for things that will serve our purpose of building the positive and effective relationship.
- Always give others credit that is rightfully theirs. Remember that everyone has an ego need. Everyone needs to be appreciated, to be recognized and to be accepted.
- Remember that resistance is something we created. People can only resist us when we resist them. Remove the resistance, and we remove the problem.
5. Ten Ways to Improve Human Relations
- COMMUNICATE with people. Speak to people. Wish people and give a cheerful word of greeting.
- SMILE at people. A smile is the only curve that put a lot of things straight.
- Address people by their NAME. The sweetest sound to anyone is the sound of his own name.
- Be FRIENDLY and HELPFUL. What we give will return to us, often many times more than we gave out. Besides, people appreciate helpful and friendly people.
- Be CORDIAL to others.
- Be genuinely INTERESTED in people.
- Be generous with PRAISED, and cautious with criticism.
- EMPATHIZE with people, feel their feelings, and we will understand them better.
- Be THOUGHTFUL. People have feelings and pride, too. Consideration is a quality always appreciated.
- Be of SERVICE to others, and give others the opportunity to be of SERVICE to us, too.